Dear Friends, I have been retired for many years and now live at Shannondell in Audubon, Pa. I am a long time friend of Thelma Reese. I am old and understand the good and bad of this life. Our retirement facility is large and has many wonderful residents. The staff is excellent and try to be upbeat but they are 30 or 40 yrs younger than the residents. We have been through all the problems they will eventually go through. A hard as they try it still gets lonely here and it’s nice to hear from somebody our own age. When I am with a group of friends here, in a few minutes, the lines in our faces disappear and I am sitting with a group of people who I see as young again. The women are pretty and the men handsome and we know life and the same songs every week.
I distribute a happy letter, no bad news, no politics, just nice thoughts. It is free email. When you give your address to me I will send you a copy for you and your friends. It gives my friends HAPPY THOUGHTS. (Leave your email address in the comments and I’ll add you to my list! And don’t worry, I won’t share your email address with anyone.)
ElderChicks 
I consider myself very fortunate to be a friend of Ed Barrett who actually walks the walk of connecting people who especially now are often isolated and lonely. Even those who may not be living alone are experiencing loneliness during this time. I can personally promise that writing to Ed will help to spread a beautiful way to help lift spirits that need lifting. We don’t ordinarily publish requests for this kind of response. Here we happily do!
Thanks, Ed!
Thank you for this lovely offer!
Ed, you sound totally comfortable and happy, which was a pleasure to read! Just wanted to extend a HAPPY VALENTINE wish to you and all your friends.– Donna
Lslee149@gmail.com
Thank you. I would like to receive your happy letter.
I would love to hear from you.
Sending you virtual hugs 🙂 I’m only in my late 60’s but I live alone, and it does get lonely especially during Covid! I’m a romance author who writes “seasoned romance” defined as any characters over forty. Some of my heroes and heroines are even in their 90’s. They are good clean stories that emphasize that it’s never too late to be in love. We all need a little hope in our lives right now.
Jill, hero and heroines in their 90’s!! That is totally cool!
Donna
I’d love to receive your happy letter, Ed! thanks!
I love this idea. Looking forward to hearing from you.
I am 77 years okd – 78 in April – and I’ve been retired since 2010 which hardly seems possible. I lived in a new 62+ apartment complex community for two years and went in with the hope it’d be my forever home. Sadly, but perhaps more importantly, I learned new things about myself living around my near-peers.
First, I was most saddened about what I consider false advertising geared toward a vulnerable population. When I first rented my apartment, part of my reasoning was that I’d be able to afford to live comfortably on my fixed budget for many years. I was not a good financial planner during my career; however, I’m so glad that I’ve worked full-time almost all of my adult life since I graduated from high school in 1961 at the age of 18. Because of my longstanding employment, I was fortunate to have banked enough time to qualify for what I consider a “decent” income from my Social Security benefits. But there were many who lived in that apartment complex who’d spent a large part of their lives as stay-at-home mothers. Consequently, when they “retired,” their Social Security was clearly insufficient to meet their monthly living expenses. After my first year of renting my small apartment (which was fine because I don’t need a lot of space to be happy), the rent was increased, but not more than I could still afford. But during my second year living there, the rental formula changed significantly. No longer were there three monthly rental levels based on the size of a tenant’s apartment. All of a sudden, all 1-bedroom apartments were priced the same, regardless of size. For those in the smallest apartment square-footage-wise, that meant their rate increase was $20/month. Those of us, including me, living in the middle size apartment had to pay $40/month more. But those who lived in the largest square-footage apartments were subject to a $60/month rent increase. Many of those tenants could not possibly afford to put out $60 extra a month just for rent on their fixed income, so they had to move. Part of that apartment complex’s appeal to me was that it was advertised as “affordable housing” for senior citizens. But it took only a year for me to realize that was false advertising.
I also relate to what you’re saying about younger management. No matter what, a 25-35-year-old manager can in no way know what it’s like to be over the age of 62. It’s nit a criticism; it’s simply a fact. Consequently, I believe if young people are in management positions, they have no idea what older tenants require in terms of amenities. This can be something as simple as a bar to hold onto when you get into the shower. Or perhaps a bar alongside the toilet to assist an older person who has osteoarthritis in their knees which makes it difficult to easily sit on the toilet seat. Those were not installed in every apartment. When I had knee replacement surgery, I had to ask for a bar to be installed beside the toilet, and I had to pay $25 to get it. The price itself wasn’t even the biggest issue for me. It was the fact that it wasn’t already installed when I moved in. I was lucky because there was a bar beside my bathtub, but not so in every apartment. Again, I felt that “amenity” should have been standard in every apartment. That is only one example of lack of amenities geared toward making life easier for seniors.
The biggest faux pas as far as I was concerned was that there was no handicap accessible door in the clubhouse where tenants often gathered. I spent a lot of time researching the local laws regarding handicap accessibility in public places. Okay, in a way, the clubhouse wasn’t a “public place.” But why would there not have been thought put into planning that senior apartment complex which would consider how many older adults must use a walker simply to get from point A to point B? For those tenants, opening what was a heavy door was impossible in some cases and at least more difficult than it had to be for others. That’s to say nothing about those tenants who had to use a wheelchair to get around. As a result of my research, I learned that the most minimum requirement for a handicap accessible door was that it have no more than a 5-pound pull. So, I couldn’t really say that the owners/investors for that apartment complex weren’t meeting the lowest legal standard for a door in the clubhouse to be accessible. That issue alone bothered me a lot. I felt like it shouldn’t have even been an issue.
Lastly, all was not unpleasant living in that senior apartment complex. As you’ve said, there really is something to be said about a community of people who have similar life experiences. I always laughed about how when someone said, “Do you remember…?” almost everyone knew what you were talking about. No other explanation was necessary. Whether it was the same songs we knew, the changes in social structure that had occurred during our lives, or the shared experience of having grandchildren, almost every person who lived there could relate. That made conversations among tenants easy, enjoyable and relevant to our lives.
Essentially, I learned (again) by living in a senior apartment complex that it’s not important to my happiness to live where there are lots of people. I knew already that I was an introvert and can be happy by not being surrounded by other seniors. Actually, part of what I liked best about working was that every day I spent in the office, I was exposed to coworkers in a wide age range. I felt like it also helped me to have to learn new technology as it was introduced in our office because it helped me to keep my skill set current. But I basically enjoyed interacting with all ages of people.
I’m not asking to be included on your list of those to whom you send “happy emails.” That’s mostly because I already try to embody JOY in my life in every way I can. You could say that my mother set me out on this path by naming me Joy. I collect all the Joyful things I can and display them in my living space. Some are Christmas themed, others are not, but I display them year round to remind myself that joy is my life purpose. The vanity license plate on my car even expresses my joy for life because it reads, BEJOYFL. Since 2003, I’ve created personalized greeting cards for family and friends that I call “Thoughts of JOY.” For a time, I picked up photography as a hobby and branded my photos as “Scene by JOY.” But, all of that said, I applaud you in your efforts to communicate your joy of life by sharing it with others because I believe if there’s anything we need more of in this world, regardless of our age, it’s joy in our lives.
Dear Joy , Bravo! Your JOB now is JOY OF BEING!!….I respect the “joyful” things you surround yourself with, it truly is so dear to the Heart…Inanmate objects come alive by you giving breath and liveliness to it…. it keeps you Young I want you to know that I HEAR you loud and CLEAR….Your Opinions and Concerns of “affordable senior housing” should be made AWARE and sent to all the major newspapers so the world and Americans can know your plight….The Owners, miserly ways and heedless ignorance of Americas Elder pleas of simple and practical amenities should be paid attention to and taken into accountability by the managers…Proper Adults and not the young untrained Automatons who cannot empathize with the elderly therefore not able to serve appropriately or accordinly…Proper Adult supervision is essential…”WE the People” are hearing you Joy!….Blessings on your Brave Soul!….sincerely, Ibu Miri…
stephaniecostello@yahoo.com
Davidsband@yahoo.com
I’d love to send cards, short letters to a couple of folks there. I have pen pals, enjoy doing this. Please let me know how.
I’d love to receive your newsletter. Thank you.
Ed, I look forward to reading your happy letter. Thanks for being you and sharing your happy self with us! Thelma has wonderful friends
Ed- I’d love to read your happy letter. Thanks for offering it.
Always like to hear happy thoughts
This message is to Joy. I loved reading your letter and I agree with everything. I am 71 and still working because I, too, planned poorly! I never thought I would get old. Seriously. I work in the healthcare profession as a case manager. discharge planner and quality analyst, which means that I am often faced with finding alternative housing for patients. It is brutal out there.
I love what you’re doing with your happy letter idea. What a wonderful gift especially during Covid. Thelma has shared some wonderful stories about your incredible generosity with me. I’d like to connect!!!