Work has always been a very important part of my life and often defined me. I spent the last 48 years working both at home and “out of the house”. They were indeed rewarding years: raising children, entertaining family and friends, traveling with my husband, and contributing to the education of young children. Professionally, I worked in a variety of capacities such as teaching, leading others as a school principal and serving as a consultant and seminar leader.
So as I round the corner of seventy, I ask myself, “What is my work now?” Our children are grown, we find travelling a chore, and there are no more letters to answer from teachers, parents, and children seeking my advice. I ponder this question and I share my answer with other seniors who perhaps are groping with the same issue; other seniors who find themselves “unemployed,” looking for work.
My answer…I continue to work…on myself! I never had the time to find out who I am. Now I do. This is my work now. This is my right! This is my right as a woman. Too many of us have lost themselves in roles as wives and mothers. Too many have lost themselves in the workforce, competing with men for recognition. Now I have time to think about me, my needs, and to give myself permission to do that which makes me happy! I have time to volunteer at the Pet Partner Program. I have time to explore relationships both past and present. I have time to work on being the best wife, mother, grandmother and friend I can be. And when I ask myself how I wish to be remembered …I quote my dear mother who died one year ago. She said,”I hope that I was there for all who needed me.” I’m working on that!
ElderChicks 
I relate to your desire to ‘find yourself.’ I’ve felt sheepish about telling anyone that’s how I felt. AT 85, I thought I should be closer to that goal than I am now. But you’re right, of course. We women, so many of us, have been too busy taking care of our families and others to think about ourselves. I am so glad to have read your post on the subject. I don’t feel so alone in my desire.
As I was on the threshold of retirement I said to one of my daughters, what WILL I do with myself? She wisely said to me that she really can’t wait for retirement –even though she loves her work. She envied the time and opportunity I would now have to pursue all that I never had time for.
She was so right. Despite all the new challenges –some welcome and some dreaded– that have come my way, these years have been an opportunity for many possibilities. To try things I may never achieve but what-the-heck-what-have-I-got-to-lose. To give my time freely without concern for the Promotion and Tenure Committee. To reflect on who I am and what I want to be when I grow up. To spend as much time alone as I wish (since I really enjoy my own company).
These are precious years. Few external pressures. Still lots of internal ones. But I can respond to them at will. Until this phase of my life, I felt more responsibility to my family and work than I did to myself. That, of course, was a choice I made. But, like Georgia, now I choose me. I give my time where, when, and how I want to give it: standing on street corners registering voters, helping teachers at the art museum, trying to play better bridge, spending winters in Sarasota, trying to get a book written and published, gallivanting around the world visiting my children and grandchildren who have decided that the whole world is their neighborhood, teaching inner city kids to knit (and reflect), etc. etc.
Yes, these senior years are a threat AND an opportunity. How I face both is my challenge.
Georgia, for me you’ve exactly hit the nail on the head. “Unemployed” no longer has meaning when we use this gift of time to take previously unexplored paths. Employing what we’ve learned and gaining new learning seems more and more to lead inward, and the better we come to know ourselves, the more we seem to have for others, sometimes without even realizing it. If we’re really lucky, we can even spot glimpses of a legacy started long ago and begin to work on new ones.
Yes, yes we do have more time and I spend the time trying to make new friends of all ages. New friends give you a new outlook on life and can make your life more interesting. I have lost so many old friends. I just made a big pot of veggie soup to take to some of my new friends that are not feeling good.
Sunie Levin
I love the idea of “working on myself! Like all of you, I never had a chance in my nursing/teaching life to do much else. Thanks for giving me an answer when I’m asked what I’m doing!