This topic is very intriguing. I have moved from being very needy and dependent on what others thought to a woman who is not afraid to say, “I need to process this.” We are all a combination of independence and interdependence; it’s just how do we strike the balance? I was very fortunate to have had a great career doing something I loved. I thoroughly enjoyed traveling on my own, doing presentations and building business relationships. However, I could not have done that without the unconditional support of my spouse, mother and children. Now my spouse and I are adjusting to two people who have had a lot of time independently being together daily. Here again, both my husband and I are able to be independent and also interdependent. I am available to help my mother, but do not feel that I have to help her make every decision. That would take away her independence. I love seeing my children raise their children encouraging the same independence I encouraged with them. Just remember that balance isn’t the same for everyone and there is no such thing as perfect balance. What seems right for one person is not necessarily right for everyone.
Growing into Independence by Marilyn Arnold
July 3, 2012 by ElderChicks
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It is also possible that those of us who have grown into independence may also have to grow into dependence at some point as we age. Yet another life challenge! As we have helped others, there may be a time when we need help from others. The challenge as I see it is to accept help graciously when we need it thus giving others the same opportunity to be helpful that we have had in the past.